My first summer as a married woman, instead of taking a vacation, My Man and I went on a construction mission trip together to Iasi, Romania. I remember one of the first nights there, the local missionary, Jeri, passed out ceramic hands that were palm up and opened. He shared with us the passage of little boy Samuel hearing God in the night and thinking Eli was calling him. Finally Eli told him it was the Lord and Samuel responded to the Lord, "Speak Lord for your servant is listening." He went on to say that our life should be lived with Open Hands always. Open to hearing from God. Open to doing His will. Open to obedience. Open to doing what seems to be the impossible. That message has stuck with me my entire marriage. Not too many years later, God called us to serve as overseas missionaries for 2 years. The Open Hand message came to mind. Over the years many situations have presented themselves where God has tenderly reminded me that my hands must be kept open to His will. His ways are always better than mine.
This past July we were told that MQ's biological parents were expecting another baby and wanted us to consider adopting her biological sibling. We've been telling people the last year that 9 is a good number for us. Our family is complete. We have no plans to add any more children, especially at our age. We did not pursue this adoption. This adoption pursued us and we knew this was something we needed to seriously consider in prayer.
As we prayed and talked and shared with our teenagers the decision before us, I was yet again reminded of the Open Hands that the Lord asks us to keep. When I considered all of the reasons for passing up this opportunity to raise another child, they were all centered around myself....my time...my energy level....my age.....my reputation. I know My Man carried his own mental battle of the huge financial responsibility to raise 10 children, not to mention the thought of attending this child's high school graduation using a walker and sporting bifocals on a glasses chain.
But you know, my life is not about me. It's not about being comfortable. God never called us to a life of comfort but to a life of complete surrender....with Open Hands. If the Lord has equipped me to raise 9 children so far, then He will equip me to raise another. If the Lord has financially provided for My Man to have funds to raise 9 children, then the Lord, who owns the cattle on a thousand hills, will continue to provide. We KNOW this to be true.
Sometimes I just want to be normal. I don't always want to be known as the mom with a million kids. The mom with the freakishly large family who bakes bread, raises chickens and cans her vegetables. Sometimes I fear that our unusual family scares people off from getting to know me and realizing I'm more like them than they know. But the reality is, we are not normal and it's o.k. because God calls each of us to follow Him in different directions. Not everyone feels led to raise a multitude of children or homeschool or live overseas sharing Jesus or committing their lives to feeding the poor....the list goes on.
We talked with our teen Fish Sticks. We wanted to make sure that they were supportive, that they were not resentful of adding another child, that they did not feel slighted by being raised in such a large home, that they would joyfully embrace another baby in our home. We were almost surprised at the overwhelming excitement that our kids showed us. Caleb said his only regret would be that he would have to leave for college when this baby was only a few months old and what if this baby didn't really get to know him as a brother. So we said YES! We said YES to raising another child to know and love and serve Jesus. MQ has brought so much joy to our family - we can't put into words how much we all adore her. We have room for another.
So Fish Stick number 10 is due Jan. 20. Eighteen months apart. I've had 2 babies at once several times before, but I wasn't in my 40's back then like I am now. I have so many eager helpers around here that I know we will have to take turns just to get to help.
Would you as our friends and family join us in prayer as we prepare for this little one. Pray that God will provide, protect, bless and prepare. Time and again we are blessed by a community of believers who surround us and support us. Thank you so much! It makes all the difference!
